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Family counselling can help when siblings aren’t getting on, or when parents and children are going through a divorce or separation. Forming a new family is a challenge and it is at this point that many parents contact Relate for some support to help everyone settle. 

When families go through change, it can be difficult to learn to adapt. Counselling can help family members to support one another through these difficult times, to reduce conflict and arguments and grow stronger as a result.

It's amazing how many parents realise the extent to which their child has bottled up their feelings – once the child feels safe, they can speak openly for the first time…. Children really appreciate being listened to. They pick up on conflict and if they don’t have another outlet it can badly affect them.

The family is both the fundamental unit of society as well as the root of culture. It ... is a perpetual source of encouragement, advocacy, assurance, and emotional refueling that empowers a child to venture with confidence into the greater world and to become all that he can be.

Of all our social institutions, the family is perhaps the one with which we are most familiar. As we proceed through our lives, our experiences within the family give rise to some of our strongest and most intense feelings. Within the family context lies a paradox, however: although most of us hope for love and support within the family -- a haven in a heartless world, so to speak -- the family can also be a place of violence and abuse.

The family uses people, not for what they are, nor for what they are intended to be, but for what it wants them for— its own uses. It thinks of them not as what God has made them, but as the something which it has arranged that they shall be.

Family values are a little like family vacations -— subject to changeable weather and remembered more fondly with the passage of time. Though it rained all week at the beach, it’s often the momentary rainbows that we remember.

Family quarrels are bitter things. They don’t go according to any rules. They’re not like aches or wounds; they’re more like splits in the skin that won’t heal because there’s not enough material.

What until now has been considered a "normal" family, made up of a father, a mother, and a number of children, has in recent years increasingly begun to be viewed as one among several options, which can no longer claim to be the only or even superior form of ordering human relationships. The Judeo-Christian view of marriage and the family with its roots in the Hebrew Scriptures has to a significant extent been replaced with a set of values that prizes human rights, self-fulfillment, and pragmatic utility on an individual and social level. It can rightly be said that marriage and the family are insitutions under siege in our world today, and that with marriage and the family, our very civilization is in crisis.

In truth a family is what you make it. It is made strong, not by number of heads counted at the dinner table, but by the rituals you help family members create, by the memories you share, by the commitment of time, caring, and love you show to one another, and by the hopes for the future you have as individuals and as a unit.

Every family has a story that it tells itself, that it passes on to the children and grandchildren. The story grows over the years, mutates, some parts are sharpened, others dropped, and there is often debate about what really happened. But even with these different sides of the same story, there is still agreement that this is the family story. And in the absence of other narratives, it becomes the flagpole that the family hangs its identity from.

The intact family appears to offer a myriad of benefits for adults and children. The married home tends to provide a safer and healthier home environment. On average, children in intact families fare better in school, exhibit fewer behavioral problems, and are more likely to form healthy romantic relationships as adults.

If someone walked up to you and said "Hi, I'm your third cousin, once removed," would you know what they meant? Most of us don't think about our relationships in such exact terms ("cousin" seems good enough), so many of us aren't very familiar with what these words mean. When tracing your family history , however, it can be important to understand the various types of cousin relationships.
 

Just to complicate matters, there are also many cases of  double cousins . This situation usually occurs when two or more siblings from one family marry two or more siblings from another family. The resulting children, grandchildren, etc.  are double cousins, because they share all four grandparents (or great-grandparents) in common. These types of relationships can be difficult to determine and it is usually easiest to chart them one at a time (through one family line and then through the other line).
 

Being a parent can be one of the most difficult (and rewarding!) jobs around. It’s not something that you can be perfect at. Most parents are doing the best they can for their kids while juggling work, friends, managing a house, and lots more.

Bornstein, M.H. (2002). Parenting infants. In M.H. Bornstein (ed), The handbook of parenting, vol 1, 3-44. NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.

Rutter, M. (2002). Maternal deprivation. In M.H. Bornstein (ed), The handbook of parenting, vol 4, 181-202. NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.

All relationships and families go through difficult times and experiencing occasional problems and conflict in personal relationships is normal. However, sometimes these problems can become overwhelming.

There are times in all relationships when things don't run smoothly. Often, this is because people have conflicting expectations, are distracted with other issues, or have difficulty expressing what is on their minds in ways that other people can really hear and understand what is being said. Sometimes they just don't know what to do to make a good relationship. The following material is about ways of enhancing relationships and working with common problems.

We often give love in the way we want to receive love even though we may not know our partner’s love language. Partners may wonder why they aren’t getting love in the way they want even though they are giving love in that way. For example, you are giving your partner gifts but what they want is quality time together.

* Please be aware that this framework was proposed by Dr. Chapman who is a pastor and an author. His suggestions are not necessarily supported by social science, nor claim to be a product of an academic work. More importantly his framework is built upon a religious background with a focus on heterosexual couples. However, anecdotal evidence suggests that this framework may help not just heterosexual romantic couples but couples of all kinds (same-sex couples, parent-child dyads, friends etc.) to “fill up their love tank” and to express their care for the other in a heartfelt way.

Each of these is an emotional demand, and has potential for damaging the relationship.
Remember, too, that the words "I love you. I like being in a relationship with you. You're important to me." are not demands and need to be said occasionally in any relationship.

Time spent apart and time spent together is another common relationship concern. You may enjoy time together with your partner and your partner may want some time together with you, but you also may enjoy time alone or with other friends. If this gets interpreted as, "my partner doesn't care for me as much as I  need" or "I resent the time my partner spends alone because they don't want to spend it with me and they must not really love me," you may be headed for a disastrous result by jumping to a premature conclusion.

Check out with your partner what time alone means and share your feelings about what you need from the relationship in terms of time together. Perhaps you can reach a compromise without you feeling rejected or neglected or thinking of your partner as selfish, inconsiderate, or non-caring.

Giving up your personal friends should not be a requirement of being in a relationship. Neither should it be assumed that your partner will like your personal friends as much as you do. You might ask: "Which of my friends do you enjoy seeing and which would you rather I see alone or at other times when I'm not with you?"

There is certainly no reason to share with your partner a friend who she or he does not enjoy. You can see those friends somewhere else or you can see them at home at a time when your partner is out doing something else.

The experiences of military life can affect Veterans in ways that may impact their relationships. In this video, Veterans talk about working through problems with their friends and loved ones and finding solutions that benefit everyone.

Relationships with friends, family, and co-workers can have a major impact on your everyday life. The love, support, and friendship of people who care about you may make the good times even better and can help you get through the bad times. Oftentimes, Veterans get closer to their families and friends when faced with challenging situations; yet there are occasions when difficult experiences or unhealthy relationships with family members, friends, or peers can cause excessive stress or challenges.

Many Veterans are dealing with stress related to military family life or challenges that are common to many families, such as finding or keeping a job and caring for spouses, children, or elderly parents. Relationships can be strained by these situations even when family and friends are also a source of happiness and support.

Relationships can change quickly, especially after a major change in your life, or changes can happen slowly over time and may be difficult to notice. You may want to reach out for help if you notice any of the following in your relationships:

You can take a free, confidential self-assessment to see if you may have issues relating to your family or relationships. Although this short quiz can’t tell you for sure if you have family or relationship problems, it may be helpful in deciding whether it would be a good idea to see a professional.

Every day, Veterans who served in the Army, Marine Corps, Navy, Air Force, and Coast Guard connect with proven resources and effective support for family and relationship issues. If family or relationship problems are affecting your health and well-being or getting in the way of your happiness, work, or daily activities, you may want to reach out for support. This is especially important to take care of immediately if violence or physical aggression is a part of your relationships. Consider connecting with:

Learn more about what you can do if you are experiencing specific concerns related to family and relationship problems, such as stress and anxiety , depression , posttraumatic stress , a history of military sexual trauma , and alcohol or drug problems .

Coaching Into Care
This VA program provides guidance for helping family members encourage their Veterans to get on a better track. Free, confidential assistance is available by calling 1-888-823-7458 or emailing  CoachingIntoCare@va.gov .
http://www.mirecc.va.gov/coaching/

At every stage of life, our relationships and families present us with both joys and challenges. Learning to manage stress, to understand our own emotions and behaviors, and to communicate effectively can help strengthen our own emotional health, as well as our connections to the important people in our lives.

For an extensive list of local and national treatment providers, both for-profit and non-profit, you may also visit www.SAMHSA.gov We recommend reviewing providers' accreditation with www.NAATP.org and www.jointcommission.org .

Many addiction experts suggest that by removing yourself from your typical environment, and your “triggers”, it becomes easier to get and stay sober. With that in mind, would you like to learn about some of the best options for treatment in the country?

In the context of human society , a family (from Latin : familia ) is a group of people affiliated either by consanguinity (by recognized birth), affinity (by marriage or any other relation ship like siblings families etc..), or co-residence (as implied by the etymology of the English word "family" [1] ) or some combination of these. Members of the immediate family includes spouses, parents, brothers, sisters, sons and/or daughters. Members of the extended family may include grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, nephews, nieces, and/or siblings-in-law . Sometimes these are also considered members of the immediate family, depending on an individual's specific relationship.

In most societies, the family is the principal institution for the socialization of children. As the basic unit for raising children, anthropologists generally classify most family organization as matrifocal (a mother and her children); conjugal (a husband, his wife, and children, also called the nuclear family ); avuncular (for example, a grandparent, a brother, his sister, and her children); or extended (parents and children co-reside with other members of one parent's family). Sexual relations among the members are regulated by rules concerning incest such as the incest taboo .

Christopher Harris notes that the western conception of family is ambiguous, and confused with the household , as revealed in the different contexts in which the word is used. [9] Olivia Harris states this confusion is not accidental, but indicative of the familial ideology of capitalist , western countries that pass social legislation that insists members of a nuclear family should live together, and that those not so related should not live together; despite the ideological and legal pressures, a large percentage of families do not conform to the ideal nuclear family type. [10]

According to the work of scholars Max Weber , Alan Macfarlane , Steven Ozment , Jack Goody and Peter Laslett , the huge transformation that led to modern marriage in Western democracies was "fueled by the religio-cultural value system provided by elements of Judaism, early Christianity, Roman Catholic canon law and the Protestant Reformation". [13]

"Times have changed; it is more acceptable and encouraged for mothers to work and fathers to spend more time at home with the children. The way roles are balanced between the parents will help children grow and learn valuable life lessons . There is great importance of communication and equality in families, in order to avoid role strain." [14]

A "matrifocal" family consists of a mother and her children. Generally, these children are her biological offspring, although adoption of children is a practice in nearly every society. This kind of family occurs commonly where women have the resources to rear their children by themselves, or where men are more mobile than women. As a definition, "a family or domestic group is matrifocal when it is centred on a woman and her children. In this case the father(s) of these children are intermittently present in the life of the group and occupy a secondary place. The children's mother is not necessarily the wife of one of the children's fathers." [18]

The term blended family or stepfamily describes families with mixed parents: one or both parents remarried, bringing children of the former family into the new family. [20] Also in sociology, particularly in the works of social psychologist Michael Lamb , [21] traditional family refers to "a middleclass family with a bread-winning father and a stay-at-home mother, married to each other and raising their biological children," and nontraditional to exceptions from this rule. Most of the US households are now non-traditional under this definition. [22]

In terms of communication patterns in families, there are a certain set of beliefs within the family that reflect how its members should communicate and interact. These family communication patterns arise from two underlying sets of beliefs. One being conversation orientation (the degree to which the importance of communication is valued) and two, conformity orientation (the degree to which families should emphasize similarities or differences regarding attitudes, beliefs, and values). [23]

 

 

 

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